


McKisses and McStitches

by Kristin_Aubrie



Category: Grey's Anatomy
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-21
Updated: 2020-06-12
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:15:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 11,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23768341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kristin_Aubrie/pseuds/Kristin_Aubrie
Summary: -Meredith was getting really mad, she had been on Addisons service and the red head was being a capital B bitch all day long to her. And Meredith was not having it-
Relationships: Meredith Grey/Addison Montgomery
Comments: 59
Kudos: 37





	1. A Surgeons Desire to Heal

**Author's Note:**

  * For [bobbiejelly](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bobbiejelly/gifts).



Meredith was getting really mad, she had been on Addisons service and the red head was being a capital B bitch all day long to her. And Meredith was not having it.  
After their surgery, which Addison yelled at Meredith the whole time for “messing up”-which she hadn’t.  
She followed an Aggravated Addison into an on call room, Addison didn’t know Meredith was following her and she sure was not in the mood.  
Addison walked in the in call room and was surprised when someone followed her in and slammed the door.  
“What the hell is wrong with you” Meredith yelled time Addison.  
“What are you yelling about Grey” Addison said with a sigh as she sat down and laid her head in her hands.  
“You have done nothing but attack me all day, and I haven’t done ANYTHING WRONG” Meredith was furious.  
“Don’t test me NOT today Grey” Addison said as a warning, there was an emotion in her voice Meredith couldn’t quite name.  
“Why what are you going to do TELL ME MY NOTES ARE WRONG” Meredith fumed recalling earlier events of the day.  
Addison got up off the bed and looked visibly distraught. Addison walked up to Meredith and looked her in the eyes.  
“I’m sorry for what I’m gonna do” Addison says as she pulls Meredith into a one sided kiss.  
Meredith is shocked and her mouth is wide open as she watches Addison tear up a little bit and walk quite quickly away.  
“She kissed me..” Meredith said as she brought her fingers to her lips.

Meredith was confused, first Addison heckles her all day and then she just out of no where, KISSES HER. McSatan just Mckissed her and she was McFreaking out, and now she wants MCDONALDS. Meredith and Cristina get their things and head to McDonald’s, so they don’t get drunk and sleep with random people at joes.  
“She kissed you” Cristina restates confuses.  
“YEAH, I’m confused too don’t worry” Meredith says as she picks up her fries.  
“So... was it good” Cristina said white her eyebrows raised.  
“Was what good... YOU MEAN THE KISS” Meredith said in horror.  
“Well duh” Cristina said dipping a chicken nugget into her vanilla milkshake.  
“Well... idk I really didn’t.. erm... kiss her back” Meredith said a bit embarrassed.  
“Your telling me that ADDISON one of the HOTTEST women in the hospital KISSED YOU and you didn’t kiss back... I am so disappointed” Cristina said jokingly.  
“She wasn’t in her right mind.. I mean she was crying, she was upset that’s all I’m worried about right now” Meredith slumped into the uncomfortable booth seat.  
Meredith and Cristina finished their food and got up to go home.  
“You know where I go when I’m not in my “right mind”, I go to joes” Cristina said suggestively.  
“I am not going to joes, I am dark, twisty, and horny because McDreamy left me for the Rose girl” Meredith said with a huff.  
“All the better reason to get drunk” Cristin bellowed.  
“........fine let’s go” Meredith laughed.

———————At The Bar———————

-Addison’s POV-

Addison was 5 shots in and deeply regretted the day. SHE had KISSED MEREDITH GREY. She had been upset because Derek had said some things to her, and they hurt her.  
“Joe keep them coming, but cut me off at 17” Addison said with a sigh.  
“Okay but that IS a lot you know” Joe said with a laugh.  
“That’s what I need thooughhhh” Addison said as she laid her head on the counter.  
Addison drank her shots as she heard a familiar voice come from the door.  
“No No no no no no no no no” Addison thought out loud.  
“Joe I am going if needed a lot of shots right now” Addison said as she tried to hide herself.  
“Cristina YANG did you really blackmail someone for surgeries” the voice that was DEFINITELY Meredith spoke.  
She sunk even further and hid her face with her hands as the familiar voice sat RIGHT NEXT TO HER.  
“Oh god she doesn’t notice it’s me” Addison said in her head.  
“Here’s your shots Addie” joe said at JUST the right time.  
Addison shot him a death glare as the interns noticed her.

———————————————————

Merediths POV

She looked over beside her as she heard Joe say Addisons name.  
She looked over and was shocked, she hadn’t even looked like herself, her usually curled hair was in a low messy bun, she was in a T-shirt and sweat pants. But the worst part was her make-up was basically gone because she was crying- which Meredith could tell from her tear stained cheeks- Meredith felt sad, she dint know why but it hurt her to see the surgeon this way.  
Addison turned with a smile that screamed “I’ve been outed” as she said with a sniffle “Well Joe looks like its time you call me a cab”.  
Addison looked like a different person, she was usually so fabulous and looked like a super star. She looked like a mess-to which Addison would agree- Meredith was about to say something as Addison laughed, with tears in her eyes.  
“Words can’t even begin to say how embarrassed I am, I look like a mess and I’m acting like one... I’m just going to go to the bathroom” Addison said as she began to cry a little bit.  
Meredith could tell she was about to cry a lot more by the look on her face.  
“Cristina tell me I’m not stupid” Meredith said as she got up.  
“Your not stupid- now why are you gonna do” Cristina said as Meredith walked away.

-Addison’s POV-

Addison basically ran to the bathroom, she went in there because she was about to cry, and didn’t want anyone to see. She was sleep deprived and it showed. Addison locked herself in the corner stall, sat on the floor and cried. Addison jumped as the door opened and someone came in. She tried to quiet her sobs, but it was really hard.  
She began to cry a little harder as Meredith knocked on the stall and asked if she was okay.  
“Yeah I’m GREAT” Addison replied with a sniffle.  
“Can you open the door.... it’s okay.. I mean about earlier... I don’t care about that” Meredith said comfortingly.  
Addison stood up as she cried and opened the stall door. Her eyes met Meredith’s and she began to sob uncontrollably. Meredith pulled Addison into a hug, “what happened” she asked with a whisper.  
“..Derek” Addison’s voice hitched as she spoke.  
“It will be okay, I promise” Meredith said as Addison’s sobs began to die down.

Addison cleared her voice “thank you.... Meredith” Addison said with uncertainty.  
“Derek has hurt me too, but he has hurt you more” Meredith said as her eyes met Addison’s.

“He called me an adulterous whore, and said I would be lucky for ANYONE to love a skank like me” Addison said as her eyes dimmed.  
“That isn’t true, if anything IM the whore” Meredith laughed to which Addison laughed back. 

Meredith walked Addison back out to the bar.  
“Your cab is here” Joe told Addison.  
“Okay... thanks” Addison said as she began to walk out to the cab.

“Okay what was that” Cristina said with disbelief.  
“Derek broke her... I’m gonna help fix her” Meredith said with certainty.


	2. The Dark is a Friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lots of tears, and the beginning of a new found...... Friendship?

———————————————————

-The Next Day-Addisons POV-

Addison had a killer headache from joes the night before. She remembered part of last night, but not the whole thing.  
She could recall Meredith, comforting her in the bathroom, but nothing else really.   
Addison got ready for work and then she stopped for a minute, realizing she would have to face Derek today. She would have to face him.. everyday.

“..Everyday” Addison said out loud.  
She sighed, everyday she will be upset.

———————————————————  
-At the Hospital-  
\- Merediths POV-

Meredith was on a phone call with Cristina, talking about the night before.

“What if she doesn’t remember and I’m sitting there watching out for her, and she thinks I’m a STALKER” Meredith says over dramatically.

“You’ll be fine, you save lives and she saves baby lives. What could go wrong” Cristina says while eating stale cereal. 

“Derek, that’s what could go wrong, HE is SUCH an ASS do you know that. If he says something to Addison again I’m going to BEAT him with his own stupid scrub cap” Meredith says with lots of emphasis.

“Okay I hope you have fun, don’t injure your prized surgeon hands though, we don’t need another Alex” Cristina says with a smirk.

“I’m going to head to the hospital now, see you soon” Meredith says as she hangs up on Cristina. 

As Meredith parks in a parking spot she spots Addison in her car fixing her makeup in the mirror.   
“That’s so cute” Meredith thinks and then after she contemplates what she just said because she is STRAIGHT.

She gets out if her car and gives Addison a wave as she walks past the red heads car. She notices Addison’s sad smile, she had probably been crying again.

Meredith marches her self over to Addison’s car, opens her car door, and plops herself down in the front passenger seat.  
Addison looked quite confused as she tried to hide all the tissues on her lap.  
“No more crying, I can’t stand seeing you so hurt, and I don’t know why but STOP PLEASE THIS IS KILLING ME” Meredith practically begged.

Addison laughed and said “okay I wouldn’t want to kill Meredith Grey Richard would FIRE me and then KILL me”.  
Meredith smirked and then agreed.  
They walked together into the hospital and went to get coffee together before rounds. Everything was going great until Meredith sported Derek angrily walking toward her and Addison.  
“Addison I want you to walk away and do it quickly” Meredith said seriously leaving Addison confused, but Addison listened and left.  
Derek went to follow Addison, but Meredith blocked his way.  
“Why do you need Addison” Meredith said sternly.  
“This is NONE of your business Meredith now get the HELL out of my way” Derek said angrily.  
“No I will NOT, You aren’t going to RUIN her day now you TURN around and go talk to your favorite person in the whole world” Meredith said as her voice cracked on her last few words.  
“And who would THAT be Meredith” Derek said annoyed.  
Meredith looked up with hurt in her eyes “Rose” she stuttered as she ran towards the direction of Addison.

Meredith found Addison leaning against a nurses station talking to mark. Meredith wanted comfort and for some reason she wanted that comfort from Addison.

———————————————————  
-Addison’s POV-

Addison was talking to Mark about his nurse of the day as she looked over to see Meredith walking toward her with tears in her eyes.  
“Meredith what’s wrong” Addison said as worry flooded her brain.  
“D.. derek and his s.. Stupid STUPID girlfriend, he can act like I’m wrong but I know..” Meredith stopped as she realized how public the nurses station was.  
“Come on, come with me” Addison said as she tugged on Meredith’s sleeve pulling her to an empty patient room. 

Mark on the other hand was VERY confused. He looked over to Cristina who was doing charts.  
“Did you see that, They are having a meeting without me, and I thought I was the president of the slut club” Mark said jokingly.   
“Idk I just tend to watch Meredith walk into a bunch of drama, it’s like a soap opera” Cristina said joking back.

———————————————————  
-in the empty room-  
Meredith was starting to cry as Addison laid a hand to rest on the blondes shoulder.   
“So.. um.. you said you knew something” Addison said trying to not be insensitive.  
“That ROSE girl, she... she’s just my replacement” Meredith said as her heart broke.

“NO one, you hear me No one could replace you Meredith. DEREK hurts people he took you for granted, but you can’t let it bother you. But if you do just do it in front of him, so yknow he feels bad” Addison said making Meredith laugh.  
Meredith laid her head on Addison’s shoulder as she sighed.  
“We are MESSED up” Meredith said with a giggle.  
“We really are” Addison laughed back.

———————————————————  
Addison was doing surgery on a pregnant patient when she got paged to the ER.

Addison let someone else finish as she ran to the ER.  
When she got there she saw a pregnant patient with a chunk taken out of her scalp. “Oh great I’ll get to work with Derek” she thought sarcastically.

She walked into the private ER room and began examining the patient.   
“She’s 26 years old and is 34 weeks pregnant” a nurse told her.  
“Okay by the looks of it she’s not in active labor but I’ll be keeping a close eye on her, someone page me after her neuro and plastics surgery” Addison said after examining her.

Addison wanted to bury herself in a hole. She did not want to work and have to deal with Derek. She guesses she can ask Meredith and Cristina if they wanna go to joes tonight and complain about men.

Addison liked that idea.

———————————————————  
-Merediths POV-

Meredith was in a good mood despite Derek and his stupid self. She was feeling happy specifically because she cheered Addison up, she was starting to think they were going to be good friends.  
Meredith had been up for a while now when bailey pulled her into a 6 hour long surgery. She soon became exhausted and really needed to sleep.  
As soon as that surgery was done and Meredith finished her charts she decided to head to an on-call room to finally sleep.

Meredith went up to the room and opened the door, when she opened it she saw DEREK and ROSE and they WERE NOT wearing clothes. Meredith BOLTED away, that was something her unholy eyes thought they were too holy to see.   
She basically ran to the other side of the hospital trying to unsee what she saw. She wasn’t looking where she was going and ran right into Addison causing them both to fall and Addison’s papers to go everywhere.   
“Oh my god this is the worst 5 minutes ever, Are you ok Addison, I’ll pick this all up I’m sorry” Meredith said quickly as she picked up the papers.  
Addison grabbed Meredith’s wrists so she would stop picking up the papers.  
“I’m fine okay, but are you okay you look pale” addison said with worry glinting in her eyes.  
“I just um.. saw something, and now I’m running away from it” Meredith said with her eyes wide.  
“Well what did you see” Addison said as she picked up the papers with Meredith’s help.  
“Um you don’t want to know, I PROMISE you that” Meredith said swiftly.  
“Maybe I don’t, but tell me anyway” Addison said with a confused smile.  
“I saw Derek.... and Rose... in the on call room” Meredith said awkwardly.  
“Oh that sounds..... terrible” Addison said as she looked at Meredith, they both began laughing.  
Addison noticed Meredith was still very pale and was now sweating a lot.  
“Are you sure your okay, Your burning up” Addison asked as she felt Meredith’s forehead.  
Meredith just realized how dizzy she felt as she said “I don’t think I’m oka..” she stopped as her vision began to black out.

“SOMEONE GET ME A STRETCHER AND PAGE WEBBER” Addison yelled to the nurses station.


	3. As Serious as a Semi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Addison has to work with Derek all day, will it be okay or will it all crash and burn.

———————————————————

———————————————————

Addison hurried Meredith to a room, she started an IV to get her fluids.  
“What do you think is wrong” Addison asked as she paced around the room.

“It’s probably a cold mixed with over exertion, she is probably running her self into the ground with work” Richard said as he began to start the tests for different things.  
“So she will be okay” Addison said as she glanced up.  
“Probably as long as it’s not bad, I could be wrong” Richard said as he left the room.  
Addison let out a sigh of relief and sat in the chair by the blondes bed. She was passed out and still hadn’t dropped her fever.  
Addison held the blondes hand and whispered “your going to be okay, you have to be. Who else is gonna tell me not to cry about Derek and his “stupid self””.  
Addison fell asleep in the chair beside the blonde, still holding her hand.   
And hour later Richard walked in,   
“It’s looks like she has pneumonia, along with dehydration” Richard said as she began to administer medicine to Meredith.  
“How serious is it” Addison said as she squeezed the blondes hand.  
“It’s not too bad she should be okay by the next week or two, she passed out from the dehydration and exertion” Richard said as he write in her charts.   
“Oh.. okay” Addison said with a sigh of relief.  
Addison was hoping the blonde would be okay, she thought of her as a friend. All of her old friends have sided with Derek in their divorce so she was quite lonely.   
All she had wanted was someone she could trust, and now she had Meredith.  
She looked up when she felt a squeeze on her hand. Meredith was looking at her tiredly, she coughed a little bit and asked “.. what happened”.

“Oh thank god, oh you.. your okay” Addison said as she smiled warmly at Meredith.  
“Do I pass out because if so that calls for tequila” Meredith suggested.  
“Do you ever think about anything that isn’t tequila” Addison laughed.  
“Almost never” Meredith laughed back.

She had many visitors throughout the day including Cristina, Callie, and Richard.

At the end of the day Addison helped Meredith get ready to go home.  
“Can we get tequila” Meredith pleaded.  
“If you never... EVER tell Richard, then we can get tequila and cry about men, we should have Cristina come also” Addison suggested.  
So Meredith, Addison, and Cristina drank tequila and complained about men all night and eventually fell asleep in Meredith’s living room.

———————————————————

The next morning when Meredith woke up she saw no one was with her in her room. She walked out to see Addison and Cristina in the kitchen making waffles together. Well Addison was making waffles and Cristina was holding the syrup .  
“Hey Meredith, how are you feeling today, we were going to bring you breakfast in bed since your sick, but I guess you can eat out here” Addison said as she laid the waffles on the plates.

“I’m feeling better, I think, these meds really do suck though” Meredith laughed as she sat down.

“I love these waffles, but where’s my COFFEE” Cristina said dramatically.

“It’s brewing still, it’s almost done” Addison said with a laugh.  
Meredith finished her food and said “thanks for the food Addie, I’m going to go back to sleep”.  
“Okay, call me if you need anything me and Cristina are going to head back to the hospital” Addison added.  
“Okay I will, could you like bring me your charts, I have a feeling I’m going to get bored” Meredith jokes.  
“Okay I’ll bring you food later” Addison said as she grabbed her coat. “And I’ll bring the gossip” Cristina added.  
Meredith went to her room and passed out on her bed. She felt happy, she had a good morning.

———————————————————

Addison was having a shitty day having to work with Derek because of her pregnant patient. And of course he was in a terrible mood today, he was yelling at everything and anyone that got in his way.  
Addison was walking to her patients room when she ran into Derek.  
“Get the HELL out of my way, unlike SOME people I am a VERY good doctor so my patients NEED me” Derek said as he looked Addison in the eye, he was furious.  
“You need to calm down Derek you have been yelling at EVERYONE all day, and you will not yell at me SO CALM DOWN” Addison said pointing a finger at him.  
Derek walked closer to her making Addison back up slowly.  
“You aren’t anything, you are a waste of space and I am tired of having to look at you EVERYDAY” Derek said as Addison backed into the wall.  
“I am not going ANYWHERE this is MY job so GET over yourself” Addison said becoming a bit scared as she was trapped between Derek and the wall.  
Derek got a look in his eyes, a very scary look. Derek punched the wall right beside Addisons head, Addison flinched while Derek screamed “You will never be ANYTHING, because I am EVERYTHING” And with that he speed walked away.

Addison began to sink to the floor, she sat there and cried. She wanted Meredith to be beside her and comfort her, to tell her not to cry. Addison quickly let Richard know she was taking the rest of the day off for an “emergency”. She got in her car and drove to Meredith’s house as she cried, she was terrified let alone all of her confidence had been swept away from her.  
When she pulled up to Meredith’s house she ran to the door and knocked urgently as she cried.  
When Meredith opened the door Addison collapsed into her arms, crying into her shoulder.  
“Oh Addie...” Meredith said as she rubbed circles into the red heads back.  
“I.. I thought he was going to hurt me” Addison whimpered out as her and Meredith walked to the living room.  
“Who, wait what’s wrong, did someone try to hurt you” Meredith said as she filled with concern.  
“No.. Derek, he.. he has been in a bad mood today and he.. he said some stuff and backed me against the wall and punched it.. but it was really close to my head a.. and I.. I” Addison couldn’t finish before Meredith pulled her into a tight hug. Addison laid her head against the blondes chest as she cried.  
“I.. do you wanna go get lunch.. I’m really hungry” Addison asked with a laugh.  
“Yeah I am really hungry too” Meredith laughed back as she got up to get her purse.  
Addison fixed her makeup and hair and grabbed her coat. They drove to a Chinese place a few blocks away. They ate in the car since Meredith was still sick, but still got a good view that wasn’t the inside of a house.  
“I like how I can spend time with you and it be different than anyone else” Meredith said with a warm smile.  
“Me too, it’s different then when I spend time with my good friend Naomi or Callie. It’s... Refreshing” Addison said as she ate her spicy noodles.  
“I agree, you can be one of my people” Meredith said as she ate her chicken.  
Addison looked at her confused  
“Your people?” She asked with a grin.  
“Yes Cristinas my person, and you can be my person too, I have people” Meredith said as she played with her chicken.  
Addison found it quite adorable that she played with the chicken, “I guess that’s something that happens with a “person”” she thought in her head.  
Addison drove Meredith back to her house and put the extra Chinese in her fridge.  
“I’m going to go home now I’ll see you tomorrow” Addison said as she gave Meredith a goodbye hug.

“Bye Addison” Meredith said with a smile as she walked back into her house.

Meredith went into her kitchen and noticed a note on the counter.

“Ps I left some cans of soup for you in your fridge Get better soon,  
-Addison”  
Meredith read the note and smiled as she sent Addison a quick text thanking her for the soup.

Meredith - You didn’t have to buy me soup, but thank you :)

Addison - it was no problem, but I expect the same when I’m sick ;p

Meredith read over the texts and went to sleep. 

———————————————————  
-Addison’s POV-

Addison was driving home with tears in her eyes. The stuff Derek says really effects her, even more than she lets on.  
Addison finds it a little hard to see through her tears when she drives plus it’s dark out. So Addison reached over to her passenger seat to grab her tissues she was struggling to grab the box. 

She leaned farther over trying to grab them as she runs a red light slamming into another car. Addison shielded herself as she flew through the windshield. she hears ambulance sirens in the distance.  
“..m... meredith” she manages to get out before she blacks out.

And then the world went black before her eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omg I know there’s a lot of drama but It’s greys so it’s basically all I know.  
> Stuff is happening,  
> Give me your feedback and ideas they all help me write and to be better at writing


	4. Hit You Like a Hurricane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will Addison be okay, will Meredith be okay, I can’t say anything without revealing stuff 😂😭✌️ Peace out people

———————————————————

Addison woke up a while later, she was on the ground, specifically in the grass.  
She heard the ambulances and tried to scream for help, but instead she just coughed up blood.  
She passed out again as she tried to get up.

———————————————————  
-Meredith’s POV-  
Meredith was confused when her phone started ringing, it was 2 am and she was sleeping.  
She picked up the phone and was supposed to hear mark on the other line.  
“Hey Meredith have you seen Addison” Mark said urgently.  
“She left my house hours ago to go home, isn’t she at home” Meredith said as she got up and put on her coat.  
“No she isn’t, I have been searching and calling her for hours, but no answer” Mark said as she heard him punch something.  
“I’m on my way I’ll try calling her, I’ll go check the hospital too” Meredith ended the call and quickly got in her car, she was driving to Addisons hotel when she saw a car crash.  
And it was ADDISONS car.

She quickly got out of her car and ran the the ambulances.

“Where is the lady from this car” Meredith said worried.  
“We don’t know mam, we are looking, we think she flew through the windshield” the ambulance guy said as he pointed to the hole in the windshield.  
Meredith started looking when she heard coughing in the trees beside the road. She ran over and saw Addison passed out, and blood everywhere.  
“SOMEONE I NEED SOME HELP OVER HERE” Meredith screamed as she checked Addisons pulse.  
She started CPR and put pressure to her wounds.  
“Please... please... please live” She said as she cried.

———————————————————  
-At The Hospital-

Meredith stood in the ER in front of Addisons room.  
“Addison’s room” she shuddered  
She was covered in Addisons blood, she had texted mark and called Cristina, but she was frozen.  
Addison was in critical condition, and Meredith knew it too, at least 5 different attendings were working on her right now.  
Mark ran into the ER beside Meredith,  
“What happened, is she okay” Mark asked as he looked to Meredith.  
Meredith hadn’t realized but she was crying, silently sobbing.   
She thought this was her fault, everyone dies around her, anyone she gets close to.  
“This.... this is my fault, everything is my fault” Meredith said with a blank stare as her voice cracked.  
Mark pulled her into a hug fighting off his own tears as he told her “this isn’t your fault, I know you guys are getting close. We just have to hope everything will be okay”.

Meredith nodded as they began to take Addison to the OR.  
“What’s happening where are you taking her” Meredith said as she went to Addison’s side.  
“She has internal bleeding, we are taking her to the OR now” Bailey said as she pushed the button for the elevator.  
Meredith watched as Addison disappeared into the elevator, she realized something as she stood there.

That could be the last time she sees Addison breathing

Meredith paces in locker room as she awaits Addison’s surgery to finish.  
Cristina is sitting on the bench saying something, but Meredith is blocking her out, she’s blocking the world out.

Meredith keeps spacing as Cristina grabs her arm.  
“Mer are you listening to me” Cristina asked calmly.  
“I.. I need to go to work” Meredith says as she rushes to see one of her patients.  
Meredith started taking patients in the clinic, Cristina came down 30 minutes later.   
“Meredith I’ve been looking for you everywhere” Cristina says out of breath.  
Cristina pulls Meredith by the arm into a storage closet.   
Meredith looks up to Cristina slowly as she says “what if she dies”.  
Tears immediately start falling from her eyes, her mother always told her “when it rains it pours” she never got it until she realized that it was true.  
Derek was the beginning of the rain and now a CAR CRASH. There’s a full blown HURRICANE going on.  
“Life is a hurricane Cristina, this whole day is a HURRICANE” Meredith says as Cristina hugs her.  
Meredith sighs as her pager goes off, “Addison’s out of surgery” she says wide eyed.  
They rushed to Addison’s room, when they got there Addison was still unconscious and she had Derek beside her doing charts.  
“She has a Brain bleed, I fixed it but she.. she might not wake up” Derek said as he left.  
Cristina left Meredith to be with Addison for a while.  
Meredith sat down beside Addison and held her hand.  
“Please wake up, please wake up Addison, I can’t do this without you. YOU are one of my people, we need to eat Chinese food still, oh my goodness this is all my fault” Meredith sobbed as she laid her head down on Addison’s bed.  
Her head was faced toward Addison as she cried, she closed her eyes and just kept pleading, pleading for Addison to be okay.  
“Please wake up, I’m sorry I’m so sorry this is all my fault, I made you come to my house and you left late..... this is all my fault” Meredith said as she squeezed Addison’s hand.  
She squeezed her eyes tight together and just cried.  
She simply cried, she felt like a two year old, but she cried.  
She felt a hand wipe away her tears.  
She looked up in disbelief when she saw Addison looking at her, wiping away the tears.  
“No.. more.. crying” she said weekly with a smile.  
“A.. Addison..... OH Addison” Meredith said as she hugged the red head.  
“I thought you were dead” she said as tears ran down her cheeks.  
Addison put her hand on Meredith’s head “we could never get that lucky” she said with a smirk.  
Meredith started crying harder as she lectured Addison “please don’t joke about that.... I.. this.. this was all my fault”.

“No it isn’t , buuut I was your nurse, and now you can be mine if it makes you feel better” Addison said as she wiped Meredith’s cheeks.  
“Ok they don’t call me Doctor Grey for nothing” Meredith said with a laugh as she laid her head in Addisons lap.

Addison fell asleep and Meredith slept in a chair next to Addisons bed. 

———————————————————

Meredith visited Addison in the hospital daily, and brought Addison her favorite robe, so she wouldn’t pull a Cristina and show everyone her underwear through the hospital gown.  
They made a lot of jokes about how hospital food sucks.  
“You know hospital food sucks EVEN MORE as a patient” Addison laughed as Bailey walked in.  
“Well soon you won’t have to be a patient, I’m releasing you tomorrow” Bailey said with a smile.  
Addison smiled and looked at Meredith who smiled back to her.  
“Your staying at my house and NEVER driving away from my house after 8 ever again” Meredith said as she held Addison’s hand.  
She didn’t know why but since the crash it felt so easy to hold Addison’s hand. It was nice, it was like their two hands fit perfectly together.  
Addison looked down at their hands and smiled as she said “Okay DOCTOR Grey”.  
“Okay keep that up and I’ll start calling you MAM, which I know you hate because you say it makes you feel old” Meredith laughed as they hit their foreheads together, making them laugh even louder.  
———————————————————  
The next day Meredith packed up all of Addison’s things, she had been in the hospital for two weeks and basically turned the hospital room into her second house.  
“Your going to have to pick me up some things from my house, I could come with yo...” Addison started rambling on.  
Meredith put her hand on Addison’s mouth and simply said “Nope, you can be quiet about doing anything except living in my room”.  
Addison turned a pale pink as Meredith made her comment.  
“I’ll just sleep on my couch, my back will suffer because of you” Meredith said dramatically as she put a fist into the air.

Meredith put all of Addison’s things into her car and loaded Addison into the passenger seat.  
Meredith started driving as Addison started playing with the radio.  
Meredith thought it was fairly cute as she watched the red head start to bob her head to the music as she looked out the window.  
“..adorable” she murmured not realizing she had spoken out loud.  
“Did you say something” Addison said as she looked over to Meredith.  
“Ummmmm.... Nope nothing” Meredith quickly stated as she turned red.

As they arrived at the house Meredith helped Addison up the stairs and into her room.  
She carefully helped her sit on the bed.  
“That was a lot of work but I must say that your bed is HUGE” Addison giggled.

“Big bed, Big Brain” Addison said as she tapped Meredith’s head.  
“That was so.... soooo stupid” Meredith laughed getting Addison to laugh along.

Meredith left as Addison fell asleep, she couldn’t help but let her eyes linger on the tall women.  
Even Meredith could admit she was drop dead gorgeous, but something was different, she didn’t know what though.

She went downstairs and got one of the cans of soup Addison had left her, she made them for her and Addison’s lunch.  
When she came back up with the lunch tray of soup, crackers, and tea Addison was laying there with a tired smile on her face.  
“Is that the soup I gave you” Addison laughed.  
“Yes, oh yes it is, only the finest of soups for Ms. Montgomery” Meredith said with a dramatic bow.  
Addison laughed as Meredith sat down the lunch on a side table next to the bed.  
“Hey meeeeredith” Addison said with a goofy smile.  
“Yeees Addison” Meredith replied mocking the way she held out the word.  
“Your SOUPER nice for making me food” Addison laughed.  
“I take it back now THAT Is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard” Meredith said as she laughed herself to tears.  
“No your stupid” Addison said with a fake pout.  
Meredith thought it was adorable so she did what any normal human being would do.  
She took her finger and booped Addison’s pouty lip.  
She closed her eyes and laughed but when she looked back up she saw a very red Addison breaking out in the sweats.  
“Addison... you good” Meredith says breaking the doctor out of her trance.  
“Oh Um... Yeah I’m good..” Addison said as she tugged at her collar and hid under her blankets.  
“I’m going to go get the spoons I forgot them...” Meredith said suspiciously.  
“Mhm” Addison said as she was very flustered and badly hidden under the blanket.  
Addison didn’t know why but a sensation of... tingling.. went through her whole body, head to toe when Meredith touched her lip.  
She was pretty confused about why it happened... and maybe a bit more confused that she.. well.. liked it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG SHES STILL CONFUSED BY HER LESBIANESS BUT THATS OKAY 😭😤✌️


	5. Scared Straight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Addison and Meredith grow closer as Addison stays at Merediths house. What with happen when they get a bit... for say... touchy

———————————————————

When Meredith came back upstairs Addison was back to normal and not so.... weird. She handed Addison her spoon and they sat in the bed eating soup and talking about surgeries.  
“Was it cause I touched your lip..” Meredith asked randomly.  
“What... um... noo..” Addison said a bit awkwardly, she tried to focus on the soup so She wouldn’t look up to Meredith And turn into a blushing mess.

“Oh my God Addison, I’m sorry... I violated your personal space.. I’m sor..” Meredith stopped talking as Addison replicated what she had done earlier, placing a finger a booping her lip.  
“Just... eat your soup we’re even now” Addison said with a smirk as she grabbed some crackers.  
Addison wondered if the blonde had felt the tingling, she wondered if she liked it (like she had earlier). 

“What’s on your mind, where are you at” Meredith said peaking interest in the red heads gaze, full of thought.  
“Well... uh.. no where in particular” Addison said meeting the blondes gaze.  
“You left me.. you get a look in your eyes, and your bottom lip tucks under your top lip. And it’s like your somewhere else..?” Meredith said while taking another bite of her soup.  
Addison turned red as she didn’t realize how much the blonde had been studying her.  
“I.. uh.. THIS ISNT FAIR” Addison threw her hands in the air with a laugh.  
After they ate Meredith did the dishes and came back upstairs. She helped Addison to change quickly (low key trying to not stare at her boobs). She gets Addison a cup of water and places it on the night stand.  
She quickly changes into her own pajamas and arranges Addison’s things for the next day.  
“Goodnight Addison” Meredith says as she leaves turning out the light and closing the door.  
Part of Meredith didn’t want to leave, part of her felt Addison feeling the same way, but she left.   
She slept in her really uncomfortable couch, and woke up to see Addison slowly walking down the stairs.  
“Jesus Addison what are you doing.. just wait” Meredith exclaimed as she jumped up to help Addison down the stairs.  
She sat Addison down where she had previously been sleeping moments before.  
“I was bored okay, and you wouldn’t wake up..” Addison says embarrassed of her current state.  
Meredith looks to her phone to see many MANY missed calls from Addison.  
She sat down next to Addison with a sigh.  
“I’m really sorry Addison, I could buy an air mattress or something so I could be upstairs with you” Meredith says thinking of ways to solve the issue.  
She looks over and notices Addison had a few tears running over her cheeks.  
“Oh Addie what’s wrong” Meredith says as she Moves closer to the red head.  
“I feel so.. so stupid and I can’t do anything for myself, I can barely walk down the stairs. I’m such a burden” Addison says laying her head in her hands.  
“Addison Adrianne Forbes Montgomery look at me right now” Meredith said gaining Her attention “you are not a burden, you are healing, just let me help you heal, I will move the earth if it mean you get better okay. So it doesn’t matter if I have to move and air mattress up to my room”.  
Addison sat with her mouth wide open, her gaze softened as she hugged the blonde. “Thank you” she said softly.  
“You know your bed is big enough for like 4 people, you don’t need an air mattress” Addison said as she pulled away from Meredith.   
“Oh.. ok as long as your comfortable with it I mean” Meredith said as she looked the other way.  
“Meredith I said it’s okay, it’s not like your gonna get all Pervy on me” Addison said with a laugh making Meredith join in.  
“Fine tonight I’ll sleep with you in my bed so you can wake me up at whatever RIDICULOUS hour you want to do you don’t get BORED” Meredith giggled.

“10 AM IS NOT A RIDICULOUS HOUR” Addison laughed leaning towards Meredith, letting their heads touch.  
“Fineee” Meredith said while leaning back to look at Addison.  
She had looked.. well pretty. She hair was in a messy bun with a few red strands falling to frame her face. She wasn’t wearing any make up, Meredith thought she looked gorgeous without makeup. She thought that Addison was naturally beautiful, inside and out.  
“Um.. Meredith your Staring” Addison said raising an amused eyebrow.  
“What.. no I wasn’t” Meredith said completely embarrassed.   
“Okay if you say so” Addison said teasing the blonde.

“...This isn’t fair, these are mind games” Meredith pouted with a laugh.

“I could play lots of games” Addison winked while trying to get comfy on the couch.  
“MIND GAMES” Meredith said while laughing.

Meredith went to get food leaving Addison to sit in the couch and watch tv.  
She had been completely joking with the blonde, but was still kinda confused about why Meredith had been staring at her.

Addison began to think about Meredith, she thought about her hair and how it framed her pretty face...

She smacked herself on the head as she screamed “STOP IT YOUR STRAIGHT”.

She was confusing herself at this point, maybe she wasn’t straight, BUT she didn’t like MEREDITH GREY she couldn’t, she’s her EX husbands EX girlfriend. 

She was deep in thought and didn’t notice Meredith come in with the food.  
“Hey Addie I’m back” Meredith said confused when she didn’t respond.  
She looked in to see Addison sitting there, in another world. She was doing the thing with her lip, so she could tell.  
“Yoo hoo Addison, Earth to Addison” she laughed as the red head jumped.  
“how long have you been there” Addison asked confused.  
“Where did you go this time” Meredith asked with a smirk.  
“What do you mean I was on the couch” Addison said crossing her arms.  
“No I mean, you were doing the lip thing again. You go places and you don’t let me into them, you could take me along for the ride you know, you can trust me” Meredith said sitting beside Addison and taking her hand.

“Oh trust me you go with me” Addison thought in her head.

Meredith tilted her head as she waited for Addison’s answer.   
“I.... Okay” Addison nervously as she gives a half smile.

Seeing that smile makes Meredith give Addison a hug. 

“Meredithhhhhh your going to KILL me” Addison laughed as she found it hard To breathe because of how tightly Meredith was hugging her. 

“Whoopsie... heh” Meredith says with an awkward smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omg give me ideas I am having a mental block.


	6. -Who You Truly Are-

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When a push comes to shove, Meredith runs. How far will she run until Addison catches up.

———————————————————

Meredith left for the hospital in the morning. (Of course not before she made Addison eggs).  
She parked her car and was met by Christina outside the hospital.

“Soo, how are you and the devil doing” Cristina asked poking Meredith in the side.

“Don’t call her that... and we are fine.... WAIT there is NO we.. erm I mean um” Meredith gives up as Cristina starts to laugh at her.  
They walk together into the hospital and are met by Richard at the door.

“We are down a neuro-surgeon today, can one of you watch Derek cases in recovery” Richard says clearly frustrated.

“I’ll do it, but where’s Derek” Meredith says annoyed.

“I put him on medical probation, he has been coming to work drunk, that’s why he’s been aggressive towards everyone” Richard concludes.

“Drinking..?” Meredith says as her thoughts cloud her mind like a thunder storm.

Derek had been attacking Addison and her for a while now, was that why.  
Was the reason because she left him. Is this.... her fault?

Cristina work Meredith from her trance as she handed her a coffee.

“Which One are you thinking of” Cristina says with a sigh as they entered the elevator.  
“Wha.. I don’t know what your talking about” Meredith pouts.

“Yes, yes you do. Now spill is it Addison or Derek” Cristina says as the elevator gets closer to their floor.

“Well... both. Derek has been kinda attacking me and Addison and I think it’s my fault. I left him and now he’s drinking to much. On the other hand, I think I like Addison, like really like her because she’s funny and pretty and.... OH MY GOD I SAID THAT OUT LOUD” Meredith says as her internal panic button is pressed.

“Nothing I didn’t know, now calm down. It’s okay if you like Addison, and Dereks not your problem and hasn’t been since he cheated on you.... and I think you should go for Addison. She clearly likes you” Cristina says with a smirk.

“Sh.. she does..... really. Why would she like me” Meredith says with little hope.

“I see the way she looks at you and the way you look at her, your both hiding from the fact which is that you both care for each other A LOT. And also your great don’t doubt yourself, so don’t say something like ‘really’ again” Cristina says in a mocking tone as she puts a hand on Meredith’s shoulder.

“Thanks Cristina... is it... is it that obvious” Meredith asked embarrassed.

“Well duh, And I’m your person I KNOW you Mer” She says as she play punches Meredith’s shoulder.

The day drags on as Meredith sits with her four patients, which basically slept all day.  
Meredith gets plain bored and decides to text Addison.

MEREDITH:  
I am so bored.. :C

ADDISON:  
It’s not much better being stuck in a bed all day.

MEREDITH:   
Welllllll.... you’ve got me there. 

ADDISON:   
I always get you...

—————————-  
Meredith pauses she reads over the message a few times making sure she’s not crazy.  
Her heart was beating out of her chest. She liked that Addison always knew what to say... even if she didn’t know how much they helped her.  
—————————

MEREDITH:  
Thank you.. I have had a.. well interesting day.

ADDISON:  
Am I missing everything, I am about to just come back to work ;(

MEREDITH:  
Over my dead body you will, and Derek is on probation for drinking on the job. I think it’s my fault, I left him and now he’s an alcoholic... what do I do

-a few minutes later-

ADDISON:  
Come home.. right now Meredith..  
————————-

Meredith asked Cristina to cover Dereks patients for her as she ran to get her stuff.

She raced home, unlocked the door and ran up the stairs.  
She ran into the bedroom to find Addison sitting there looking at her with sad eyes.  
Addison opened her arms for a hug, so Meredith naturally sat on the bed and relaxed into the red heads arms.

“It’s not your fault, you can’t blame yourself for everything. You’re so nice and naive that you always blame yourself first.  
..bu.. but it’s... it’s not your fault Meredith” Addison says as she smooths down the back of Meredith’s hair.  
Addison was surprised as she heard a few sniffles from Meredith. She pulled back to see a few tears dripping down her cheeks.  
“Noooo... don’t cry... pleasseeee” Addison said with a sad laugh as Meredith smiled.

“Your too nice to me... I don’t deserve you” Meredith said as she pulled herself back into Addison’s hug, burying her face in her neck.

“Well.. I feel the same about you Mer” Addison says as she leans her head down onto Meredith’s.

“Wait what, but why your funny, pretty, tall, and your a great surgeon. And the there’s me I’m meh looking, I’m a terrible doctor, and I’m depressing” Meredith says as she laughs into Addison’s shoulder.

Addison can feel her face burning as Meredith clings onto her. She hates that Meredith thinks so poorly of herself.

“But your great Mer... you are a good person to talk to, you have always been there for me, you are the type of girl to plead guilty for a crime she didn’t do just so the other person can be happy. I want you to see how great you truly are, I want you to see you how I see you. Your my favorite person on this planet Mer, and I won’t let you stop knowing it. Addison says as runs circles into Meredith’s back.

Meredith hugs Addison tighter as she begins to shake a little bit.  
“I thought I told you to stop crying, unless you want me to cry” Addison teased.

“Your my favorite person too...” Meredith says as her voice cracks.

They just sit there for a long time, in each others embrace. Taking in the words of the other, like music to their ears.  
The moment replayed in their heads many times as they sat there.

Meredith thought about what Cristina said earlier, she thinks she really likes Addison.... but it would never work. She was damaged goods and Addison was like a a diamond ring. She knew Addison was aiming for a Harper Avery and was already behind. If she was with Addison she would only bring her down. She wanted Addison to rise... no... she wanted Addison to soar.

Meredith abruptly pulled back and looked away. Her eyes dimmed as she stood up.  
“..I’m sorry Addie..” she said as she ran from the room, to her car.  
Meredith drove to Cristinas and begged her to watch Addison and stay at her house. Meredith would stay at Cristinas while Cristina watched and took care of Addison at Meredith’s.

Meredith was running away, hiding from her problems... no not problems... she was running away from the truth that Cristina opened her eyes to.

———————————————————  
-Addison POV-

She watched as Meredith ran away, it felt like a stab to the heart. It truly hurt and she felt as if she was dying. She was drowning, and she wanted Meredith to be her life-saver.  
She wasn’t surprised as her tears started to fall, slowly but surely she cried herself into a nap. Hoping that when she awoke Meredith would be back.... hoping to see her again. 

When she woke up she saw someone sitting in the corner of the room. 

“Meredith..” she said sleepily.

“Sadly not.. she.. isn’t coming back for a while I don’t think” said Cristina from the corner.

“I.. I think i messed up.. she’s not used to the feeling of being cared for. I gave her too much and pushed her away..” Addison laid her head down in her hands as her voice cracked.

“It’s not your fault, she’s at my place.. I’ll drive you there tomorrow. Just tell her how you feel, how you really feel” Cristina said as she got up and took Addisons hand.

“She needs help, she doesn’t know what to do with all of the compassion. But don’t take it back. Help her understand it...... and don’t tell anyone about this. Don’t want anyone thinking I’m going soft or something” Cristina laughed as she got up and left.

Addison was grateful that Cristina was going to take her to Meredith. She was going to be back at work soon and wanted to be on good terms with Meredith. She wanted a lot of things but that seemed the easiest.   
Addison decided to go back to bed since it was late. She tossed and turned all night and eventually fell asleep with the thoughts of the young blonde intern in her head.

———————————————————

Addison woke up early and with Cristinas help changed into a dark red mid length dress. She was basically healed but still needed a little help here and there.

She felt her anxiety kick in as Cristina started driving her to her house.

She opened her door as they pulled up to the apartment building.  
Addison walked to the elevator, nervous as ever.  
When she knocked on the apartment door, part of her mind told her to run away. But she stood her ground and waited for the door to open.

When the door opened she saw Meredith, she had tear stained cheeks, she was wearing pajamas and her hair was in a messy ponytail.

“Addison... what are you doing here.. your going to hurt yourself” Meredith said mumbling the last part.

“Can I come in.... please” Addison asked as she looked to the ground.

Meredith invited Addison in, they went and sat in on the couch. Addison noticed the tissues everywhere but didn’t say anything.

“Why did you come..... I’m a mess right now” Meredith said looking at herself in the reflection of the tv.

“...just.. just stop, stop saying bad stuff about yourself. I have had enough of this. I thought when I told you the first time you would get it...” Addison said playing with the bracelet on her left arm.

“..I.. I want you to... to go home” Meredith said hiding her face in a pillow.

“No... I won’t go. You can hide all you want, you could hop in a plane and fly across the world, but I would be waiting for the next flight out. It’s MY turn to talk now, I came here for one thing and that’s YOU, so if your going to push me away and make me go home then you are coming with me. Because I’m not leaving without you” Addison said as she held onto Meredith’s hand.

“Im... sorry. Just go home, let me be alone. I have to figure stuff out by myself...” Meredith said looking Addison right in the eye.

“...you don’t have to do it alone..” Addison said as her voice cracked.

She pulled Meredith into a hug as she said “I am here, I’m here for YOU. So don’t do it alone, we can do it together, because we’ll I don’t want to do it apart. You make me so happy, and I just want you to see me, see me and feel me, and know that I will NEVER leave, despite how much you push me away” Addison Said as she noticed the blonde had started to shake a little bit.

“Don’t you see it Meredith, I.. I love you”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaaaaaaaaaa  
>  They are too cute 😤😤😤😤😤
> 
> Sorry I too so long, had a block on figuring how to write this so I took a break.
> 
> It’s longer than usual chapters by a little. But next chapter a promise at least 3.5k words. (Normally 1k-2k)


	7. IM DISAPPOINTED IN MYSELF

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I AM STUPID

I just noticed in chapter 3 I forgot to post the WHOLE BEGINNING OF THE CHAPTER LIKE A REALLY IMPORTANT PART. I FEEL SO STUPID OMG ALWAYS CHECK YOUR FANFICS PEOPLE.

SORRY IF IT WAS CONFUSING

I just posted it so you can go back and read it


	8. Dreaming of You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How can everything be perfect, or is it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know your all going to hate me 😂😭

———————————————————

Love.

The word hit Meredith like a bullet to the chest.

Love.

She thought of the the day Derek said he “loved” her.

Love.

She thought of the words her mother said to her.

Love.

Love doesn’t exist to Meredith, yet here she is.

Love... no one could love me.

Meredith is in a trance, the word has wrapped around her neck like a noose.

Love.

The word was choking her as she sat there...

Speechless.

———————————————————  
-Addison’s POV-

She was scared, Meredith sat in the same spot, in Addisons arms. But she had gone limp, it was like she was dead.

“...Meredith... I.. I could take it back.. I’m sorry” Addison says as her eyes well up with tears.

Meredith pulls back and sits there. She sat there with a dull look in her eyes, it honesty scared Addison.

“..I’m sorry.. I shouldn’t have said anything.... just forget about it... come back to reality now... please” Addison sobbed, she curled into a ball on the couch as Meredith sat still in her trance.

Addison began to freak out a bit, she was starting to hyperventilate as she apologized, she felt as if she couldn’t breath.

So she curled into a ball on the couch and hyperventilated, she felt useless as she tried to calm her breathing.

She felt a hand on her back, pulling her back into reality. 

“Meredith...” Addison said quietly through her quick breathing.

Meredith pulled Addison up and hugged her. She hadn’t said a word, she just sat and rubbed Addison’s back trying to calm her down.

Meredith didn’t believe in love, if she did then Derek wouldn’t have cheated.

Her mom would have loved her.

Her dad would have stayed.

Her dog wouldn’t have died.

She would see Addison’s genuine confession as true if she believed in love.

..But she didn’t, so she couldn’t react.

So she sat silently, calming Addison down. 

Trying to think of a person that has ever

....loved her

If you love someone you can’t hurt them, but everyone has hurt her. 

How could she know that Addison wouldn’t hurt her.

Maybe she was just scared, scared because maybe she loved Addison too.

But now she is sitting silently hurting Addison. 

..She’s hurting Addison.

———————————————————  
-back to Addisons POV-

She was surprised as she felt a tear fall on her shoulder. 

Meredith was crying, but she was emotionless at the same time.

She sat back and looked Meredith in the eye.

“Just let me in... don’t do it alone, just.. just talk to me. Let me fly with you across the world just speak.... say something...” Addison said as she took Meredith’s hand into her own. 

Meredith said nothing.

So Addison got up to go to the bathroom, to “fix her makeup”.

She went into the bathroom and closed the door, she sat on the floor and cried.

She sat there for what felt like hours, her knees curled up to her chest.

She almost fell asleep it felt so natural.

But then the door opened.

Meredith opened the door, Addison looked up and Meredith had an expression on her face that broke the red heads heart.

“...Are you okay now” Addison said still worried about Meredith’s previous state.

“I just... I never realized how many people failed at.. loving me. But then you came and you made me happy and it was amazing. And now I’m hurting you. I’m failing at loving you, because I don’t know how to. I don’t know how to show it but, I.. I think I love you too.” Meredith said still standing at the door.

She looked nervous, her knees were shaking.

“You... you do..” Addison said looking into Meredith’s eyes.

Her mascara was running over her cheeks as she spoke, but Meredith still thought she looked so pretty.

“Of course I do.. but I.. I hurt you.. and that’s not love” Meredith said looking away, turning to leave the bathroom.

She felt Addison move, Addison grabbed her hand, making her stay.

“No Meredith, it’s not, love is being able to get past the hurt. True love is being able to heal the wounds we cause. I don’t care if you ‘hurt me’ because then I’ll just go to you, The only doctor I want, to heal my wounds. We could heal... together” Addison said moving to hug Meredith form behind. 

She wrapped her arms around the blondes waist. 

“The only way you could hurt me Mer, is if you leave me, if you leave me now or 50 years from now. So stay with me now, and stay with me 50 years from now... please” Addison said tightening her hug.

“....okay” Meredith said quietly.

Addison and Meredith went back to Meredith’s house a little bit later. 

It was pretty late, they had been at Cristinas house for hours not even realizing.

They went to the bedroom silently as they held hands.

Meredith sat on the bed as Addison laid down on the other side.

Meredith laid down a few moments later, lost in thought.

Addison turned her body to Meredith and watched as she played with her hair nervously.

Addison reached over and grabbed Meredith’s hands.

“It’s okay... you don’t have to worry now” Addison said as Meredith rolled on her side to look at her.

“I know... I’m just tired I guess” Meredith said with a sigh.

“Just... just stay here. You’ll probably have trouble sleeping let alone having to also sleep on the couch” Addison said as she got up to change into her pajamas.

Meredith followed in her footsteps, reaching beside Addisons bare stomach for her own pajamas.

Addison shivered at the warmth radiating from Meredith’s arm. 

Meredith took off her shirt and then stopped.

Addison wrapped a hug around her, both of them shirtless.  
Meredith looked up to Addison, and kissed her gently, wrapping her arms around the tall woman’s neck.

Then Meredith put her pajama shirt and shorts on and buried herself beneath the covers of the bed.

She watched as Addison changed quickly, and then crawled into bed.

They both looked at each other as they laid in bed.

“You know your amazing right” Meredith said cuddling up to Addison.

Addison laughed as Meredith laid in her arms.

“I will stay now, and I’ll stay in 50 years, I’ll stay forever. As long as you stay too” Meredith said as she drifted off to sleep.

And with that they fell asleep not saying another word for the rest of the night. 

———————————————————

When Addison woke up Meredith was still in her arms, she looked so peaceful to Addison.  
She didn’t move, worried about waking the soundly sleeping blonde.

She leaned in and hesitantly gave Meredith a kiss on the cheek, to which Meredith responded with a hum of thanks.

“That’s a nice way to wake up” Meredith says while snuggling back into Addison. 

“I bet so” Addison said as Meredith rolled over to face her, laying a hand on her waist.

Meredith snuggles up to Addisons chest and Addison laughs.

“Whaaaat... I like to cuddle” Meredith says squirming around.

“Yeah definitely today you do, your like a little cuddle bug” Addison says through her giggles.

“I could stop if you want” Meredith says teasingly, pulling away.

Addison pouts as Meredith declares she’s going to get a shower.

Addison asked Meredith where the towels were through the door so she could shower in the downstairs bathroom.

Meredith said something, but Addison couldn’t hear so she leaned in closer to the door and was surprised when a half naked Meredith opened the door and pulled her in. 

“Oh my, feeling cheeky aren’t we” Addison says with a grin.

“Always, anyways we have less than two hours to get to work so we better hurry up” Meredith says reaching over to Addison.

She was surprised when Meredith started taking off her shirt.

Addison became flustered as blonde let out a low whistle.   
“Jeez give me a warn.. oh boy” Addison started to say as Meredith ditched the rest of her clothes and hopped in the shower cheekily smiling at Addison.

“Get in here we have to go to work soon, it’s your first day back” Meredith said from the shower.

Addison stripped the rest of her clothes nervously and hopped into the shower.

She looked through the steam to see Meredith washing her hair.  
She began to scrub shampoo into her hair, trying to avoid looking at Meredith.

She gasped as Meredith slipped her hands around her waist pressing herself into Addison.  
“Your adorable but I don’t bite, unless you like that then I totally bite” Meredith said planting a quick kiss on Addison’s neck.

“If I looked at you then we would be late for work” Addison said with a login still avoiding looking at the blonde.

Meredith reached past Addison brushing her arm against Addison’s for her body wash, taking the opportunity to make Addison squirm.

“I blame you for this” Addison says with a pout.

“Blame me for wha..” Meredith started before Addison whips around and pushes her into the shower wall.

They smiled at each other before Addison began to leave a trail of kisses over Meredith’s torso.

Half an hour later they are still in the shower ‘showering’.

Addison still felt pretty dirty for having gotten a shower.

They got out and started getting dressed, Addison slipped a necklace onto Meredith, it had looked fairly new.

“This is pretty, it reminds me of you” Meredith said as she played with the ruby red jewel on the necklace.

“It’s for you...” Addison said fidgeting nervously, putting on her dress.

She heard a noise behind her as Meredith hugged her. 

“Thank you addie, now I have my own little piece of you” Meredith said with a smile giving Addison a peck on the cheek.

“Yeah yeah” Addison smirked, continuing to put on her outfit.

She had gotten it the other day, it was for herself but it made Meredith happy.

They drove to work... or so Addison believed

Addison looked at Meredith creepily smiling as she disappeared into thin air, and then Addison woke up.

Addison was in her crashed car.

She was bleeding.

There was a shard of glass in her throat.

(“Nothing was real, nothing between her and Meredith had actually happened” She thought as she cried in pain)

She thought her pretend life was perfect, yet it didn’t even happen.

She began to black out

“Meredith...” she said coughing up blood.

She imagined what felt like a whole month, in 5 minutes.

What did that mean, she had a dream about...

Meredith...

and with that Addison’s vision blurred to the sounds of an ambulance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You hate me right 😂😭   
> YOU DIDNT EXPECT THAT DIDNT YOU,
> 
> I THOUGHT OF THAT IN 5 SECONDS I WANST GOING TO DO IT ORIGINALLY I SURPRISED MYSELF TOO


	9. Reality

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jus a little part I made around last month

———————————————————  
Meredith’s POV

She was watching a random cooking show when she got a call from the hospital.

She answered and then

She dropped her phone, 

She dropped it and ran for her car keys.

She was still sick, Addison had just left her house two hours ago.

Addison was upset about Derek, and went home.

Meredith rushed to her car and sped off to the hospital.

She ran to the ER and gasped when she saw Addison.

There was glass everywhere, but all attention laid on the gigantic piece of glass in Addisons throat.

“Oh.. no oh no.. I’m.. im going to be sick” Meredith said with tears forming in her eyes.

Other than the glass Addison had a head injury and her face was seriously damaged.

Mark came up to Meredith and they went with each other to wait.

“She likes you..” Mark says as they sat in silence.

“W.. what” Meredith says confused.

“I can tell she likes you, she gets happy when she sees you and stuff. She’s my friend and she likes you..” Mark says looking Meredith in the eye.

Meredith doesn’t know what to say, she’s speechless so she sits in silence.

Hours pass and they don’t get much information..  
The interns choose a few words..

“It’s bad, very bad” they say sadly.

They didn’t get it, how big of an influence Addison had been to her.

Meredith excused herself to the bathroom.

She looked herself in the mirror and just let the tears fall from her eyes.

———————————————————  
-hours earlier-  
-Addison’s POV-

She was in an ambulance being sedated.

She was scared.

She was confused.

She wanted someone.

She wanted

Meredith.

———————————————————  
-back to current time-  
-Meredith POV- 

Cristina made Meredith eat.

Meredith had just wanted to bust into Addison’s surgery and see if she was okay.

She realized something.

Addison was upset about...  
Derek.

This was dereks fault 

Meredith looked at Cristina and ran to dereks office.

She burst through the door, out of breath.  
Derek looked at her like she was crazy.

“It’s.. your fault” she said in between breathes.

“You mean Addison, she got into a car crash how’s that my faul..” he started to say as Meredith marched up to him and slapped him in the face.

Meredith ran away with tears in her eyes, she ran to watch Addisons surgery. 

It was all she could do,

And all she wanted to do.

——————————————————

Hours passed before Addison was out into a room to recover from her surgery. 

Meredith went to the room as soon as Addison entered it.

Meredith didn’t leave Addison’s side for hours.

She even slept in the chair next to the bed all night.

Addison was her friend and she wasn’t leaving until she woke up.

Her and Addison should be enemies, but it’s too hard to hate her.

She makes it so easy to like her, she’s like the loving person Meredith didn’t get from Cristina.

So Meredith had to stay with Addison, since she knew Addison would do the same for her.

——————————————————  
-Addison’s POV-

Addison woke up with a headache, she felt tired and was in lots of pain.

She went to lift her arm and was surprised to see the head sleeping on it.

Meredith 

She tried to speak but her throat hurt badly so a mumble of basically nothing came out.

The blonde began to stir and looked up with wide eyes.

“Addison...” Meredith said grabbing onto the red heads hand.

“M.. Mer” Addison said quietly as she looked around to realize she was in the hospital.

Meredith smiled, she truly smiled

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I haven’t been on here for like... a month or so...
> 
> I’ve had medical stuff going on and whatnot but I had this little part I was planning to make longer but I’ll post it since I’ve been quite absent.. hehehe
> 
> I’ll go ahead and read up on all the chapters and new stories I’ve missed throughout the month.
> 
> I just know they will be awesome cause your all awesomeee👍👍👍👍

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to do a MerAdd story because they are just the BEST. Tell me what you think of the story so far, I think I’m going to make it a slow burn. I got most of my inspiration from bobbiejelly so go check out some of their stories 😁👍. (Cause they are really good)


End file.
